Kelly Slater – 11 Things He’s Missed Out On
Nov 3. 2011 – surf news, surf industry insight, surf talk radio
Kelly Slater: Oh sure, he looks happy, but… he's never been to WalMart!
Ok, Kelly Slater has clinched his unprecedented and inspiring 11th World Title. Plenty of people, surf blogs, and PR folks (err… surf mag editors) will discuss this. I’ll leave thatto them. Bottom line: The guy is a class act and makes us all look good.
While he’s spent the better part of his life becoming the surfer and man that he is, people don’t realize he’s missed out on a lot of fun and excitement over the past 20 years.!!
In the spirit and fun of David Letterman’s Top 10 list, here are the Top 11 life pleasures that Kelly Slater has never experienced, at least not in the last 20 years (we think…)!
Kelly Slater, he’s never:
11) Participated in a job interview.
10) He’s never mowed a lawn.
9) Never said “hello” to the WalMart greeter.
8) Never looked for used furniture on Craigslist.
7) Never had to change his HR health benefits during ‘open enrollment’.
6) Never had to explain WHY it is crucially important that he go surfing.
5) Never been on a dump run.
4) Never made mindless small talk at back-to-school night.
3) Never cleared out the rain gutters.
2) Never purchased a bar of surf wax.
1) Never scrounged for golf balls in the bushes.
You see, while it may seem like Kelly Slater has had the good life, he’s really missed out on a lot of cool stuff. Consider yourselves lucky.